Daddy's Little Girl

When I was just a wee little thing
Daddy’d hold me in his reclining chair
He’d be watching a ball game,
I’d be twirling my finger through my long, straight, hair.

I knew he was listening, so I wouldn’t make a sound
Only I knew that he was looking at me,
Kinda funny too,
Especially when my mom wasn’t anywhere around.

Sometimes he’d get really mad at me
For the darndest little things,
But then he’d come to my bed at night
And; oh, all the goodies’ that he’d bring!

He gave me oodles of nice clothes to wear,
And shoes and ribbons for my long, straight hair.
Once he gave me a large opal stone;
And when I got older; I got car of my very own!

But that was sometime later;
After Mom and I had moved.
A Preacher warned her to leave him
Said the way I was treated, well, he didn’t; at all, approve.

So I got moved to my Mamaw’s
Guess I was only bout nine..
And; for years, I didn’t see my dad again,
Since Mom said, “He’d stepped over some kinda line.”

And as the years grew on and I got older
I think I understood more of what she meant
Cuz I kinda got a bit rebellious
A few Doctor’s even said I had learned to vent.

But that’s about the time I got married; the first time
Guess by then I was a whole sixteen
Then on to two, three, four, five, & six
And it’s a bit hard to remember what happened in-between.

For I smothered my anger with lots of drugs
And danced my way through the years
Drank to all my sorrows,
And tried to drown all my bitter hurts & horrid fears.

I was even angry and even blamed myself,
Not even sure of what all I’d done
All I knew is I wanted the pain to stop
Life just really wasn’t all that much fun.

So on more than one occasion;
Determined to rid myself; from all the pain,
Took a knife, some pills and some alcohol,
And I tried to end my life in vain.

But somehow that just didn’t work for me
And I’m sure glad it never did.
Cuz even tho I was all grown up by then
I was;in my heart, still just a Kid

I had so much of life to learn
And still wanted my Daddy’s love.
Then I learned I had a new Daddy!
He lives in Heaven above.

Now my old Daddy lives with my new Daddy
At least that’s where I hope he lives.
I used to pray for my old Daddy…
Cuz, my new Daddy; He forgives.

And when I go to Heaven; This one prayer I plea
That I’ll hear: “Welcome home my child"
and "sit on both your Daddy’s knee-
For you're still…
Daddy’s little girl.”
 Copyright ©2005 Sydell R. Linsicombe

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